Jo, do not live in fear.
a) Keep the bacon eating to a minimum. Maybe once a month.
b) If you give up booze I'll hunt you down and douse you with Jagermeister.
c) Keep the bacon eating to a minimum. Maybe twice a month.
d) Keep the bacon eating after drinking Jagermeister to a minimum. Maybe only during Frozen Fury 2010.
e) If you give up bacon I will hunt you down with two pounds of bacon, a head of lettuce, a jar of mayo, four tomatoes, a loaf of white bread, and I will break down your door and make delicious BLTs until the aroma wakes you...
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