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Thread: All Things:Science Fiction/Fantasy

  1. #671
    I'llPutPenniesOnYourEyes jerseydevil's Avatar




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    FRANCHISE ME: Alien Resurrection | CHUD.com

    Nice breakdown. Honestly, I don't think this is THAT bad of a movie. In fact, pretty much all of the Alien flicks bring something to the table. They mirror Dark Horse comics series' in the fact that they take the source material in completely different directions. And, I was not at all aware that Joss Whedon had written this.

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    I'llPutPenniesOnYourEyes jerseydevil's Avatar




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    ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER Review

    Oof. Just as well. I was having douche sweats thinking about walking up to the counter and actually saying 'two for AbrahamLincolnVampireHunter please'...

  4. #674
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    Little-known sci-fi fact: The incredibly filthy joke hidden in Willy Wonka | Blastr

    We've known for decades that Gene Wilder's Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory was a wonderfully subversive film, littered with nuggets that'd never find their way into a children's film today. But imagine our surprise to find an incredibly dirty joke hidden in plain sight. Or, rather, plain sound.

    Here's the deal: In 1979, Roald Dahl, the same bloke who wrote Charlie and the Chocolate Factory 15 years prior, wrote a decidedly adult novel called My Uncle Oswald. As Cracked describes it:

    The equally witty and disgusting story revolves around Oswald Hendryks Cornelius, the titular uncle and "greatest fornicator of all time." Along with his sexy accomplice Yasmin Howcomely, he devises a complicated get-rich-quick scheme that involves Howcomely seducing Europe's most famous men and then selling used condoms full of their spent semen to women wishing to birth famous progeny.
    Hurm. Well. So, there's a passage in the book where Ms. Howcomely details her encounter with George Bernard Shaw and her difficulties in getting the noted author to wear a prophylactic:

    "There's only one way when they get violent," Yasmin said. "I grabbed hold of his snozzberry and hung onto it like grim death and gave it a twist or two to make him hold still."
    Let's keep the word "snozzberry" and its definition for Roald Dahl in mind when watching this clip from Willy Wonka:


    "The strawberries taste like strawberries! The snozzberries taste like snozzberries!" What used to be a perfectly innocent nonsensical coinage has been defined, by the author, as something entirely naughty.

    In other words, Willy Wonka has made a candy wallpaper that tastes like penis ... and encouraged adults and children alike to lick it as if they'll win a prize.

    We now return you to your regularly scheduled, decidedly less icky programming.

  5. #675
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  6. #676
    Iím sicka the high hat!! santiclaws's Avatar




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    That doesn't make sense. Just because he used a made-up word in a book in a dirty way, doesn't mean it was intended to be dirty when he first made it up fifteen years previously. That's a reach (around).

  7. #677
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    Quote Originally Posted by santiclaws View Post
    That doesn't make sense. Just because he used a made-up word in a book in a dirty way, doesn't mean it was intended to be dirty when he first made it up fifteen years previously. That's a reach (around).
    Maybe...but I am going to allow it, simply because it's so funny/cool that I NEED it to be true.

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    Bandito Brothers Release THE PROTOTYPE Teaser Trailer

    The Bandito Brothers, the production company behind the commercial hit Act of Valor have released a teaser trailer for their sci-fi attempt, The Prototype. The story follows a humanoid robot (or a roboticized human) from a government program that goes rogue. As is the case when your superhuman test subjects break free, anything goes in the attempt to bring them down, regardless of how much money you pumped into their creation. The Prototype, written and directed by Bandito Brothers’ Andrew Will, stars Neal McDonough (Captain America: The First Avenger), Joseph Mawle (Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter) and Anna Anissimova.

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    Producer blames John Carter's failure on Disney's 'mistakes' | Blastr

    Despite its initial box-office failure, John Carter has rallied to post very respectable numbers in DVD sales, and most fans say the movie isn't half bad. If interest continues to swell now that the film is available on DVD, Andrews said he wouldn't be surprised to see a sequel greenlit someday—and if it is, he'll be ready:

    "It's going to get its legs back and me and Andrew aren't done with that story yet and we really want to do two and three. There's some great stuff for John Carter as a hero to deal with in the future. We're ready to go. As soon as somebody from Disney says, 'We want 'John Carter 2,'' we'd be right there."
    What do you think? Did Disney's marketing confusion doom the theatrical opening? Will a sequel ever happen?
    OhPleaseOhPleaseOhPlease.

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    China and British Warriors Will Battle What At ‘The Great Wall’?! | | Bloody DisgustingBloody Disgusting

    It was reported last week that Benjamin Walker (Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter), Henry Cavill (Superman: Man Of Steel) and Ziyi Zhang (Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon) in The Great Wall, to be directed by Ed Zwick (About Last Night, Blood Diamond). We can also add that there’s strong interest in casting “True Blood” hunk Alexander Skarsgard, although no offers have been made.

    It was originally reports that the pic is set in 15th century China and about British warriors who happen upon the hurried construction of the massive wall. As night falls, the warriors realize that the haste in building the wall isn’t just to keep out the Mongols — there is something inhuman and more dangerous.

    Bloody did the usual digging and scored some more information! In some exclusive inside info we can report that the movie will follow two former English Crusaders who will help the Chinese defend the Wall and their land against the invading Genghis Kahn and the even more dangerous T’ao T’ieh monsters!

    The T’ao T’ieh is the face of a mythical animal with a gaping mouth appearing as a motif in ancient Chinese art.
    Ed Zwick makes beautiful looking movies(Glory/Legends of the Fall/Last Samurai) so this is already on my must see list. Like the fantasy slant added to his usual historical fiction standby.

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