See, I never expected Year One to be Mel Brooks. I expected it to be bland, homogenized comedy, which is exactly what it was.
"Only a numbskull thinks he knows things about things he knows nothing about."
"It's understanding that makes it possible for people like us to tolerate a person like yourself."
3-D Starts to Fizzle, and Hollywood Frets
LOS ANGELES — Has the 3-D boom already gone bust? It’s starting to look that way — at least for American moviegoers — even as Hollywood prepares to release a glut of the gimmicky pictures.
"Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides" sold just 47 percent of its North American tickets in 3-D. Ripples of fear spread across Hollywood last week after “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides,” which cost Walt Disney Studios an estimated $400 million to make and market, did poor 3-D business in North America. While event movies have typically done 60 percent of their business in 3-D, “Stranger Tides” sold just 47 percent in 3-D. “The American consumer is rejecting 3-D,” Richard Greenfield, an analyst at the financial services company BTIG, wrote of the “Stranger Tides” results.
One movie does not make a trend, but the Memorial Day weekend did not give studio chiefs much comfort in the 3-D department. “Kung Fu Panda 2,” a Paramount Pictures release of a DreamWorks Animation film, sold $53.8 million in tickets from Thursday to Sunday, a soft total, and 3-D was 45 percent of the business, according to Paramount.
Consumer rebellion over high 3-D ticket prices plays a role, and the novelty of putting on the funny glasses is wearing off, analysts say. But there is also a deeper problem: 3-D has provided an enormous boost to the strongest films, including “Avatar” and “Alice in Wonderland,” but has actually undercut middling movies that are trying to milk the format for extra dollars.
All I'm saying is - it was a turd from concept all the way through executon and that's all it ever was. Just a harmless turd. At what point did anyone expect more?
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There hasn't really been one supernatural element that has worked, 'cept maybe the Kraken's first brief appearance. The most compelling and tense conflict of all 4 movies came from the British vs Sparrow movie-long chase in The Curse of the Black Pearl, which in all honesty was every bit as good as Raiders of the Lost Ark IMO.
Davey Jones was never a threat, never menacing, and never all that compelling. Pure "lets throw some cool looking crap at the screen, story be damned". There were a whole lot of those elements to this movie as well. The memaids could have, and frankly, should have been a lot more captivating and then threatening, but they never got past that "look, cool stuff" stage because the story was so thin. That's right out of Bruckheimer 101.
I'd say they took the easy way out with this one.
Last edited by Mondo Blando; May 31st, 2011 at 08:43 PM.
The Pirates porno has a sequel...
And then there's the robots...ba-dump-bump.
As far as the mermaids in 4 I thought they were very effective and that sequence was fairly intense. But the main draw to the Pirates franchise will always be Sparrow/Barbossa and that alone makes it ridiculous to compare franchises. Transformers is a slow child banging his action figures into each other while **** blows up.The Pirates movies may not be Ivory Merchant but I think they are a little bit more sophisticated than that.
When you introduce Davey Jones as a character who can disappear and reappear at the drop of the hat, why bother with the clangy sword fights? Why have a villain resort to playing by the hero's rules? He is never a threat.
The redemption/melancholy of Jones was right out of Tim Burton stock characters, where the bad guy is never really all that bad, so it takes most, if not all, of the emotion and intensity out of the conflict. It fell flat on its face, and both the 2nd and 3rd Pirates movies sufered for it.
It's the same failing as Batman Returns: create a foil(s) for the hero who you are never truly allowed to despise, practically forced to feel for, but never really have much reason to care whether he wins or loses. The hero then becomes bland, his goals become weakened, and the plot ultimately becomes no big deal. The resolution doesn't matter, because even though we all know how it is going to end before the trailer even comes out, there is no real reason to care about the stuff in between. It's just a bunch of junk happening up on the big screen. Exciting at times? Absolutely, even more so than most other movies. But its empty, even for an adventure flick.