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Thread: I had another insane conversation at work

  1. #1
    AAAAAAAAAARGGGHH!!!! Yog S'loth's Avatar




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    Default I had another insane conversation at work

    A couple of years ago, I posted a thread about a crazy call I had from a customer. Can't find that thread, but I had another call like that today, and it made me think of it.

    I won't bore you with the technical details of the call, as I doubt anyone really wants to get into a chemistry lesson today, so I'll substitute doughnuts into the conversation so you get an idea of what this was like.

    Yog: Hi there, I see you've ordered our Anorexic Diet Meal with extra doughnuts.

    Customer: Yes.

    Yog: Well, I just wanted to make sure you really want this. The Anorexic Diet Meal [ADM from here on out] is two rice crackers and a glass of water. The doughnuts are fat-stuffed buckets of lard. Are you sure you really want this?

    Customer: What's the problem?

    Yog: Well. Okay, I guess it's not obvious... let me explain. The ADM is generally for those looking to drastically cut calories. The doughnuts are heavily loaded in calories. You really shouldn't order both together. They don't match.

    Customer: Oh. So I can't have both?

    Yog: Uh. You can... I mean, there's room on the plate for both, but it just doesn't make sense. May I ask you about your application? What are you trying to accomplish? Are you watching your weight, or do you want tasty treats and damn the consequences? You see, I think one of these two items has been mis-specified, and I'm trying to find out which one, so we can get you what you really need. Because if you are on a medically-restricted diet and you start eating doughnuts, the implications could actually be quite serious.

    Customer: You're saying I can't have both?

    Yog: No, listen, yes. Yes you can technically have both. It just doesn't make sense. Let me back up. Do you understand why there is a contradiction here?

    Customer: Did I order both?

    Yog: Yes. Yes you did.

    Customer: Oh. Can I get both?

    Yog: Fine. Yes. Thank you for your business.

    I'm actually feeling a bit nervous about this, because if this guy is flowing Chlorine Trifluoride and has mis-matched his vessel and elastomer material, someone down the line is well and truly f***ed, and liability could potentially flow back to me.


    [EDIT] lol, and just now he called back and asked for more details, saying he thought there might be an error. You think? *whew* I think he went back and told somebody smarter than him what was going on and got his butt chewed.
    Last edited by Yog S'loth; June 20th, 2014 at 02:39 PM.

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    So, you are saying i should not have Chlorine Trifluoride with my Anorexic Diet Meal?

  3. #3
    I revoke Man Cards FishMonger's Avatar




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    Quote Originally Posted by Yog S'loth View Post
    A couple of years ago, I posted a thread about a crazy call I had from a customer. Can't find that thread, but I had another call like that today, and it made me think of it.

    I won't bore you with the technical details of the call, as I doubt anyone really wants to get into a chemistry lesson today, so I'll substitute doughnuts into the conversation so you get an idea of what this was like.

    Yog: Hi there, I see you've ordered our Anorexic Diet Meal with extra doughnuts.

    Customer: Yes.

    Yog: Well, I just wanted to make sure you really want this. The Anorexic Diet Meal [ADM from here on out] is two rice crackers and a glass of water. The doughnuts are fat-stuffed buckets of lard. Are you sure you really want this?

    Customer: What's the problem?

    Yog: Well. Okay, I guess it's not obvious... let me explain. The ADM is generally for those looking to drastically cut calories. The doughnuts are heavily loaded in calories. You really shouldn't order both together. They don't match.

    Customer: Oh. So I can't have both?

    Yog: Uh. You can... I mean, there's room on the plate for both, but it just doesn't make sense. May I ask you about your application? What are you trying to accomplish? Are you watching your weight, or do you want tasty treats and damn the consequences? You see, I think one of these two items has been mis-specified, and I'm trying to find out which one, so we can get you what you really need. Because if you are on a medically-restricted diet and you start eating doughnuts, the implications could actually be quite serious.

    Customer: You're saying I can't have both?

    Yog: No, listen, yes. Yes you can technically have both. It just doesn't make sense. Let me back up. Do you understand why there is a contradiction here?

    Customer: Did I order both?

    Yog: Yes. Yes you did.

    Customer: Oh. Can I get both?

    Yog: Fine. Yes. Thank you for your business.

    I'm actually feeling a bit nervous about this, because if this guy is flowing Chlorine Trifluoride and has mis-matched his vessel and elastomer material, someone down the line is well and truly f***ed, and liability could potentially flow back to me.


    [EDIT] lol, and just now he called back and asked for more details, saying he thought there might be an error. You think? *whew* I think he went back and told somebody smarter than him what was going on and got his butt chewed.
    Email him. Leave a paper trail. Cover your ass. That's all you can do.

    EDIT: You must have editted this right as I responded. Glad to hear it's resolved and I don't have the think about rice cakes any more.
    Last edited by FishMonger; June 20th, 2014 at 02:53 PM.

  4. #4
    Selke Smooth notbob's Avatar




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    What kind of donuts did he order?
    Maniacal Laugh, Maniacal Laugh, Maniacal Laugh

  5. #5
    #SimianNation mitchrock's Avatar




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    Doughty for donuts?
    I AM THE STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS!

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    SHOOT! Butch 19's Avatar




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    reminds me of that vegetarian pattie & bacon burger I've read about.

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    AAAAAAAAAARGGGHH!!!! Yog S'loth's Avatar




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    Another update - he just called back and confirmed his original order. I made him do it in writing, in an e-mail trail where I advised against it. That's about the best I can do, I think.
    eddieshack23 and LetTigerIn like this.

  8. #8
    Team LGK eddieshack23's Avatar




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    Here's a generic one, happens at least once a day:

    Me: 911, what is your emergency?

    Caller: I have a non emergency call.

    Me: Then call a non emergency number.
    SloMo26 and lunchbox like this.

  9. #9
    fantastic hair. lunchbox's Avatar




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    Quote Originally Posted by eddieshack23 View Post
    Here's a generic one, happens at least once a day:

    Me: 911, what is your emergency?

    Caller: I have a non emergency call.

    Me: Then call a non emergency number.
    lol. is it overworried parents or old people? i have a friend who would take her kid to the ER for every little thing... and post about it on facebook each and every time...
    eddieshack23 likes this.

  10. #10
    3rd Line Role Player Front row's Avatar




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    I was at this restaurant the other day and this lady of about 300 pounds waddles in and takes a seat near me. The waitress asks for her order and she asks for three appetizers, two entrees, and dessert, she finished the order with "an ice tea with 6 sweet and lows"
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